Hi blog, 1 post to revive you for a week....

Thoughts of people come and go were flying in and out of my mind the whole night after an event yesterday, after knowing someone that i care will going be going aboard to pursue her dreams and finally had blessing from an important person in her life on supporting her to walk down this narrow, and difficult path....

I think a lot, and my feeling is in sync with it, told me the same info that i avoided since the first incident which happened 4years back. I am trying very hard not to think about it but it somehow come in, hunting me....

Although my great buddy to advise and insist that i should not miss the opportunity again, but can i really grab this, am i capable... Unlimited flow of questions, coming out without seeing an end for it....

Maybe i'm just stupid, cause i'm about the repeat the same mistake i did back then... but the phobia, seems greater then the Great Wall of China, which i truly hope it can be broken down like Berlin Wall... the sight is nowhere to be seen....

God, please do enlighten me on the correct action to be taken.....

dance with me ;
- 6:40 AM

this chinese new year.. is kinda fun...
start the journey back at saturday morning...
where Genting is the first stop...

Glad to say is tat, my dad let me drive 1/3 of the journey back... ^^
seems like he starting to share his burden of the long driving hours to me d...
donno it is something to be happy about, or sad...

reach there around noon, and the weather is COLD!
its about sub 20 degrees....
maybe its normal for others, but its definately cold for me...
maybe i dont hv the fat to keep me warm... hehe... no offense to those who are bigger in size...

after settle down in the room and so on, we go out....
as usual walk around the complex, sight seeing and my sister do some shopping...
i seen some nice jeans like pants, its white in colour...
wanted to buy but... hehe... pocket dont hv enuff $$... =p

then, i follow my dad to the casino.... place where few years back my dad win quite a lot... ^^
i dreamt abt tat trip thou.. hehe... to imaginative...

however, my dad do gv me some $$ to play around...
seen quite a lot of kind of games...
from wat i learnt, the casino side nvr losses... *ahem* propobility *ahem*
but seems like a lot of ppl are addicted to gambling.... most chineses....
i was shock on how big amount of $$ they put in each round.... @.@
i seen one guy put 1000+ in one round.... luckily he won, if not...

played a little, help my dad won a little back, which he obviously lost... XD
then he gave me some "allowance $$".... hehe....

after tat, when back room to rest and later dinner, then continue the walk and go back room to slp...

basically the next day is also the same.. ^^


ok, the first day back at my granny hse...
received a warm welcome from cousins and my uncle and aunty...
the dinner was fantastic!!!

even thou food back in penang was famous throughout m'sia...
but the food my aunt prepared, cant eat it outside... the trip specialty...
which is one of wat i'm anticipating for this trip... XD

other then tat... nth d... =p

today is the second day of CNY, many relatives came to gather in this hse....
its damn crowded and fun... especially when its time to gv out "angpau" XD
every youngters rush in and greet the elderly.... laughter can be heard from miles away...
its one of those unique experiences for huge families....

meet and talk, chat and eat....
for me... i do the listening and laughing onli.... hehe...
can go in the conversation....
u can say not used to it or anything.... =p

but hell, at night i kept dreamt abt one person... *ahem*
donno its a good sign or not.... hope its a good 1....
it make me keep thinking of infinate possibilities abt tat...
better not disclouse it... else s'one will use tat to att me when i'm back home... =p

tonight all the my uncles will gather here again...
a beer party... thats wat i heard...

will be back to penang tmr!!
anticipating all my frenz there!! hehe....
all for now.. chaoz!!!

last but not least.... HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!!

dance with me ;
- 4:03 PM

Relationships, Feelings~

It was few years back since i had that feeling towards someone.
It was not as strong but it still there.

But the previous relationship that still haunt me prevent me from continuing pursue the new relationship.
Cowardly? Yeah i think so...
The heartbreaking time was ...
That time i had academic stuff to keep me occupied, and i isolated myself from the world for months...
But finally recover after seeing some show, make me realise about things...
"Those that are yours will be yours"
Life short, why life in some miserable and pass memory... It 'kills' you!
Although some times, memory of her still pop up here and there...

It been happy and fun to be with her, my smiles seems to be like drawn on the face which cant be cleared.
The motivation of doing things also... like drank some 'Red Bull' like drink...
It sad to see when during some dinner trip, she the one who got food poisoning and miss out all the fun in the eve... >.<

My frenz also think i should go...
Sometimes my parents also misunderstand, coz i met her very frequently...

I dont know..... I really dont know....

dance with me ;
- 8:07 AM

Recap of 2008

Its been a wild wild year. Lots of turnover and life changing? I'm not too sure about it.
But definitely one of the most memorable year in my 21 years of living in this world.

College~
Course wise, Lecturer wise, Struggle of scoring and stuff has been and always will be part of a student life.
This is no exception to me too.

Conflict between lecturers, classmates previews how life will be during the working days in the near distance future.

However, there are those fun, happy moments to be kept and store in my memories.
Classmates that are a help, add laughter and kept all of us occupied.

Thanks guys and girls!

Dance~
Received result for the Jazz Award, a distinction, which is nice. ^^
Go around dancing in events with the Jazz class friends are FUUUUUN!
Pity Jeoy had to quit, she is a nice frenz and a good dancer...
One of the gadget preparation girl...
Remembered the Distard Stamford Prom, she came up with a few Minny Mouse like ribbons in the 1~2 hours time before that performance.
Kudos is all i can say.
Keep in contact mate!

Christine back in action. Due to the terrible admin flaws in Aussy education.
Went to Aussy, thinking of pursuing further on her passion on dance, but ended up nothing.
Now investigation is still going on, period = 8 mths down from the incident.
Anyway she continue with us for the Silver exam, which is down to 4 of us this year.
Also did discover that she has a HUGE, and i do mean HUGE circle of frenz...
Anywhere she went she will be like, "that's is my ... ... frenz"... kinda envy... hehe...
A very active girl, but due to the injuries sustained, caused her to stop 70~80% of her activities...

Been thru few performance this year, the one in Penang Hill is sure to be one of the unique ones.
Performing by on the hill, you can see the mist gushed up by the wind, a natural back stage scene...
The major down side was the uneven stage floor, other then that its perfect! Nice crowded too... ^^

Will be starting ballet next year too... Ya, BALLET!! hehe...
The discussion is made for quite some time and the chance is there for me to continue and refine my skills...
Tested on the graded class... Its hard, the children are good!
Goin to take the exam next year, hope for the best!!

Joined PSSDC'08, the preparation, the rehearsal, the competition was a chalanging experience for me...
It a nice 1 too, meet new frenz and met up with some online frenz...
And i get to identify the area which i need improvement, which i will do in the coming months!
Will be joining back if possible next year, to see measure how i've done for the year...

Frenz~
Meet a lot of them recently, those that i still remember and those that still remember me but i don't. XD
One of them was at Ms Ceryl birthday party. Got updates on those mainly primary mates, and some secondary ones.
One of them is Mei Fen, one popular girl during the secondary time within CL scouts, and i had the chance of getting to noe her then.
But surprisingly, she was one of my primary mates! Although i dont really recall, but she do confirm tat fact...
She also do notice my present in the scout days too! ^^
Woman memories is superb, i must say...

Also met up with some girls from Talents Camp tat time... its been 5~6 yrs seem we met...
Luckily topic of conversation is still there...
Hwee Khei still havent change, the violent nature is still there. Been her victim for like within 1 hour we met.
Caryn look more mature (older, XDD) , after being thru quite a lot of stuff in life recently...

Club~
I havent been a club guy, and my close frenz do noe it.
But this year, especially the last month of the year, i was like goin to for 2 weeks in a row...
Which was a hard to see this in my previous days...
I even got DRUNK! >.< not totally, but nearly...
But its fun~

First one with Christine and the PSSDC '08 gang and some frenz... this was not a drinking one but dance...
Sweat all round in the crappy space in the dance floor, but all of us do enjoyed it...
There was some drama goin on, but luckily no blood was shed...

Second one was after the birthday party, this is where i got DRUNK!
Those mates open 4 bottles of liquor and drink bottom up every single time...
Few of us do drink a lot, including me... hehe...
Meet some primary guys there too... and some HSC mates...
It was fun, but in the different way as the previous 1...
But if there's an option, i would opt for the first one, thats more to my taste...

Conclusion~
This round up my year of 2008, when flash back, it seems short. Time flies, thats wat i can say...

Note: Pics and Vids can be seen at my Facebook, search for my name lo... ^^

dance with me ;
- 8:05 AM

wah!!!! its super tired!!

Juz finish the 2 hour duration Grade 4 Ballet Class....
Its is totally different from the Adult Class I been joining since 3 months....
ITS TOTALLY DIFFERENT!!
For the first hour, its all ballet exercises CONTINUOUSLY!!
I was blank for the whole class, only can do a few.... >.< so embarrass...
FYI, the students attending the class is around primary sch to max secondary sch....
I'm at least 8~10 yrs older.... >.<

Now my leg muscles are sore and no energy.... I fear later at night i dont have the energy to continue the Jazz Class....

Few days also been rough, especially last night...
Been editing some more songs, one of those is from Christine's frenz...
The song is nice... but i still dont know the name...
I mixed with Church - T Pain... I think the combination was quite ok....
Haiz.... because of that... the song has been "ghosting" me for the whole night....
Whole head full of choreography and the song is ringing just next to my ear.....
That make me night a real nightmare.... you can say i haven't actually sleep at all last night....

My eye bags was HUGE in the morning! >.<

Tomorrow will be another busy day, rehearsal at BM, continue by performance at PISA not long later...
Maybe at night will be the Team first meeting...
But that need their confirmation first lo....

Sticky body... Tired... Going for a bath then a good nap is required!!! ^^
K guys... until now ler....
Chaoz!!

dance with me ;
- 1:46 PM

quite some number of events happened from the last post till now and here goes....

Friday~
Its finally the DAY for the performance. Quite scare at first since it was a LONG time since the last commercial performance. Its not like charity show where errors can be tolerated. Ok, you should get the picture...

Slept till to late morning because the last night going to bed late ( went to Li Chang Birthday directly after rehearsal ). After resting a while, off i go for a hair cut. As this shows was all about 60s ~70s period of time, the hair styles also was those Elvis Presley, John Travolta period. At first the female hairstylist seems to know what i wanted, but it seems she didnt... donno what she been thinking all the way... luckily there's a guy stylist who is better came to fix the mess. Finally it turn out ok, it sure look good on me... ( I think )

Then off i go, waiting for Christine to drive but pity girl, she had diarrhea for whole day. So i'm the 1 driving ( which is actually my mom ) to ALP and Ms Janice fetch us from there.

Reach there quite early, Chia Ying, Andrea and Jim Wah was already there. Then we run thru the stage once and go backstage. Waited for the changing room to be available and guess what CCTV in changing room??!! Luckily they had solved it. Changed in costume, make up (boyz only need to apply foundation and some lip gloss will do.... no more heavy stage makeup like those few years back... XD)



Run thru and waited for our turn its a long time, 1 hour after each item... >.<
Crapping around and laughter never stops thanks to Sam, CY and JW....

About the dance, all went well, Candyman carrying part improved. Grease last post had a little problem, hooked on Andrea leg (donno why) but its minor. Then the last dance, everyone flattened, maybe because of the long wait.

Food was not good at all, all portions left was a lot, almost 1/2 or more untouch ( imagine that
) however desserts was good, especially the cakes and the ice cream.

For more coverage on the Dance Performance, visit Andrea's Blog, she had more photos...

Saturday~
It was exhausting, even rest throughout the day. During the Jazz class, it seems like something is blocking and can put 100% effort... >.< maybe the night before slept too late....


And Christine is planning to join the dance competition organized by Danzity in collaboration of their iDance Campaign, she found another 3 girls and me, another guy cant join because of some reasons. >.<
I dont have friends that dance, thus i guess i'll the the only guy in the team... It's going to be WEIRD!!!! haiz... need to crack head later for the chereography....

Going to a musical performance this Saturday, organized by Priscilla Ballet Acedamy. Sydney dance trope is performing, cant wait... But i heard that attending these kind of event required to wear formal attire... is it true??? if so i need to get my tie tomorrow... >.< need to spend again....

Anyway Christine's family is driving ( XD save the trouble of looking for parking as it going to be jammed), i think i'll join them... if no changes ler....


Today saw the reply by iDance, was pretty shocked actually. Anyway thanks for dropping by...
Until then, BYES~~

dance with me ;
- 10:05 PM

its been late, and it will be for the next few days...

Exams~
Currently all exams had passed.
College exam for the subject RF Design was a ... the allocated was totally insufficient.
2 hours for 4 Q with the sub Q with it, and almost 50% of it is narrative type of answer...
Even the first Q for the Smith Chart took me ~45 mins to complete...

Luckily i'm able to complete all the Qs that I KNOW in time...
Others, lets pray....

Few days after college exam was my Silver Jazz Award.
Rehearsal when on good, just a part in the dance which i always forget how to do...
The examiner this year was Ms Richardson, she is a nice and friendly person, tried to make the atmosphere as relaxed as possible so we don't tense up...
Chia Ying was the 1 responsible for the music playing. I donno why but she keep on smiling and signaling unknown sign for us. Maybe she mean to travel further or etc.?? Not sure...

All exercise (I think) went by quite good, Ms Richardson do gave positive comments for all of us.
Dance part is where i screw s'things up. I mess up some of the parts and my head keep looking down during the messed up parts, i think she would have noticed it...
So here goes my scores.... Haiz.... T.T

Wish all of us will get high marks went the result come out.... anytime near Mar next year....

Daily Life~
Its holiday.... thus nothing special except for no more extra travelling to college to attend class...

Rehearsal~
Rehearsal is tough, preparation are all done on last minute AGAIN...
Luckily male dancers costumes are easy.... ^^ no sewing, extra accesories, etc.

But poor Tracy and Chantini, both injured; Tracy just after the Silver Exam with knee problems, and Chantini just this morning with sprankled ankle i heard.
So Chia Ying and Christine need to make up for the affected dance, Candyman...
They are pro, learn the steps from scrach within an hour but polish is needed to make the steps and timing more accurate...



One funny thing thou, last night during the supper trip with Curly, he do mention to me about Ah Nam bday party which i missed last Saturday because of the Silver Exam rehearsal. He thought i'm not going because i'm feeling "kam kai" due to the fact that, his current gf was the one i broke off few weeks after the KL trip together with him.

At first i do felt a little anger about this, how can you do that when you already knew she was my gf? But after thinking, it was my fault. Reason... better not talk about. Now i'm happy that she with the lucky guy i knew who can give her all she needs.

Why do he think that way??


Woot, its a long 1 this time....
Though no one is reading but i'm will still continue adding....

Until then.... Nitez.....

dance with me ;
- 12:50 AM

dont have the time nor mood to blog for a while till now....
lots of thoughts came to mind after the rehearsal just now...

Saturday~
its a normal Saturday where we attend class and go computer lab to do RF simulations.
today, we were suppose to finish of the last part of the theory part of the syllabus and later in the lab, finalize the LNA report which we going to submit by next week.

however, no one seems to be in the mood of doing report after about 30 mins, when one of my classmate start play DoTA on the lab computer. after a while, i also join in, coz i left the last part of the report to be completed later. to my amazement, my lecturer also join in the crazy act. XD
hard to imagine huh... hehe..
we was screaming here and there, and our lecturer keep "feeding" the computer.... we lost terribly but its fun... XD
another batch which didnt not join us, watch movie...

the whole lab session become like cyber cafe environment.
screaming can be heard, laugh and anger...
wanted to laugh on when recalling....

anyway, the fun was over the sudden error pop out and the game was off...
its was about time too, thus we packed. ^^

the afternoon was the same, rest and continue on with my dance class...
the new girl that came last week didnt turn up, guess she didnt join us....
the dance is full of drama.. ^^
silver was good, everyone do improve, especially the few eights of the dance we cheoreograph ourselves.
i forget some of it, but overall it came out...
other was good, Christine did a cutwheel thing which was an eye opener.
i'm not able to do that... hehe...

Sunday~
went around last night and slept late, thus the morning also wake up late.
been doing NOTHING for the whole morning.
maybe the mind still travelling or sleeping...
continue to complete my report on 12 and end by i think 4~5.... >.<
wasnt really doing it, coz my whole family was watch drama and i join them half way and continue later....

then when its time for the rehearsal, arrived early.
run thru the steps and waited. then go thru the steps and learn some new ones.
the second part was acting, i must admit i'm not good with it.
the expression i did was not natural and big, which is required in stage act.

donno why, i feel envy for the first time on Sam...
which i think envy should be the word, he has the sence humour, into the music, into the steps which i'm lacking TOTALLY...
and i donno, how to express that but the feeling was not good, feel like been isolated from the group. been thinking on the way back, am i learning dance because i like it, or other reason, such as knowing more ppl...
the rush and enthusiasm compare to the first time i learn dancing 3 years ago was reducing.
is it because i'm frequently making mistake? or other stuffs? i donno...

i know envy is not a good feeling and should be throw away for the sake for the group, but i cant stop thinking about it.
maybe because i'm the only guy for the previous years and have a lot of attention, which i dont usually have, and suddenly losing it....

aiya... should stop thinking about it and focus on the stuff on hand...
exam coming in 1 week time and i havent really prepare yet...
talking about result, its disappointing....
talk about it next time... no mood now... >.<

dance with me ;
- 11:04 PM